
Although I never owned a Barbie doll, I did get an Action Jackson âfigureâ when I was a kid and I loved that you could dress the âboy dollsâ as Batman, Superman and other DC Comics heroes.
And, while I still prefer superhero movies to pretty much any other genre these days (other than a great comedy), I will admit that when Jannah said she wanted to go see the âBarbieâ movie, I quickly agreed.
I wanted to see what all the fuss was about, as âBarbieâ shattered the record for the top box office opening weekend for a movie directed by a woman, but I also was intrigued by the idea of a Barbie doll coming to life, especially with the talented Margot Robbie in the title role.
I also had high hopes for Ryan Gosling as Ken, despite the ridiculous-looking (at least to me) dye job to match the dollâs well-known blond locks. And yes, the teaser commercials showing Barbie and Ken getting arrested multiple times during their first trip to the âreal worldâ looked cute and funny.
What was most appealing to me was to see how director Greta Gerwig was planning to bring (almost) every young girlâs favorite doll to life and how Barbie and Ken would ultimately fare. I somehow didnât even realize that Will Ferrell (who plays the CEO of Mattel, they toy company that still owns the Barbie empire) also was in the movie until the opening credits. I enjoy some of Mr. Ferrellâs films, but he is usually so over the top with his acting that every movie heâs in walks that fine line between super-funny and super-stupid.
Well, after sitting through the nearly two-hour run of âBarbieâ a week or so after it hit theaters across the U.S., all I can say is I honestly didnât get what all the hype has been about.
In my opinion, despite having some very funny moments, the film is just so stupid and the story so convoluted that the star power does little to prop it up. My favorite characters are America Ferrera as Gloria, the mom who loved playing with Barbies as a kid (and apparently, still does), Ariana Greenblatt as Gloriaâs daughter Sasha who (along with her friends) has gotten to the age where they think theyâre too old and too cool to play with dolls, and especially, the great Rhea Perlman (best known as Carla from âCheersâ and for being married to Danny DeVito) as Ruth Handler, the American businesswoman who invented the Barbie doll in 1959.
I give Gerwig a lot of credit for at least trying and it seems that, based on everything Iâve seen about the movie on talk shows, the women of America seem to believe that the director got the story right, especially in terms of âfemale empowerment.â Yes, all of the Barbies of all shapes, sizes, colors and physical abilities are treated equally in âBarbieland, and the president is an African-American Barbie. I did understand, applaud and appreciate at least that part of Gerwigâs message.
But, what I couldnât understand was why the director had to make Goslingâs Ken the movieâs ignorant âvillain.â In the opening scenes of the movie, Ken clearly thinks heâs in love with Barbie, even though he doesnât understand why he should have sleepovers with his âgirlfriend,â who clearly has no clue as to why heâd even be interested in anything other than the two of them looking pretty together.
But then, when they travel to the real world, Ken visits a library and takes out (steals?) books about the âpatriarchyâ and decides he likes the idea of men being in charge, rather than the Barbie dolls who âruleâ Barbieland. How did these dolls even learn how to read? I know…suspend disbelief.
And, all Barbie-hell breaks loose when the dolls return to Barbieland. There are pitiful musical numbers and even a fake-weapon fight scene between all of the incarnations of the Ken doll, with Simu Liu (of the âShang Chiâ Marvel movie) as Goslingâs arch-rival Ken. While the men and their abs are fighting, the Barbies somehow find a loophole to take back Barblieland for themselves and Robbieâs Barbie ends up realizing she had been taking Kenâs needs for granted, even as she then chooses to return to the real world to live forever.
Iâve seen the movie called âhilarious,â but for my money, there were just a few laughs sprinkled into the almost nonstop stupidity. Jannah and I both had trouble sitting through it.
The best thing about the film, in my opinion, has been the merchandising. The B&B Theatres at The Grove hosted a big opening weekend âBarbieâ party and still has life-size Barbie doll boxes in the lobby that no woman (including Jannah, right) could resist dressing up in pink for and taking pictures in â I even wore my pink polo shirt for the occasion. I regretted that decision afterwards.
Again, in my opinion, âBarbieâ misses the mark as badly as most of its jokes. A better plot might have had the girl who outgrew Barbies become the âvillainâ until she realizes the value of the dolls to the girls and women who love them to somehow âsave the day.â Oh, well.